Sunday, June 26, 2005

I'm a 3.

I guess it's good I'm not a 2. Q100.5 has their "What League Are You In" up there, and Kelly sent in our pics - she's a 5 (which I disagree with) and I'm a 3 (which I REALLY disagree with). I would have thought I'd be a 5, esp. since I sent in a picture from my "thin era." Oh well. I guess this kills my theory that the reason I can't find a good guy is b/c I aim out of my league - the guys are dead on in my league... I'm just socially retarded and can only attract schlubs. Huh. Thank God I have my precious econ book to keep me company. I love you econ book! Actually, no I don't - THIS book is evil... the one I read yesterday's the one I like. I *guess* I can make it through 3 chapters of The Mind and the Market tonight - I'll be taking it with me to the gym. So I can lose weight. So I can move up a league... hell, since that picture only got me a 3, I hate to imagine what I am now that I've put on weight.

Further continuing my rain on me parade, Mom and Pop are in Iowa visiting his 2 sons. I think that's awesome, considering he hasn't seen them in forever, and I know from personal experience how important it is to have a good relationship with your father - not because I have one, but because I don't. They left Friday AM, and Mom wanted me to call her on Thursday so she could talk to me before she left. I called her at 6, she calls me back at 9:30 and tells me a list of things NOT to do, and I ask her to call me Saturday when they get in. It's now Sunday night, and still no phone call - and it's not like she's out partying - she's sick. They've been all excited about this trip for a while, understandably, but I'd like a phone call. They get up there and poo on me. I'm not being all whiny and neglected, and I'm not questioning how Pop feels about me, but I just feel all conflicted about everything. He was a grouchy ASS to me until I moved out, and now he's fine. He did nothing but critique me, and poke at me, and never let up - always found a way to find fault, and did Mom stick up for me in front of me? Nope. Took his side, or else asked him to watch it when I wasn't there. And now he's being a really cool dad, doing stuff with his kids who he hasn't gotten a chance to be a grouch at for 18 years. So, basically, I've never had a dad who took me to baseball games, or who read to me, or who always supported what I wanted to do without finding some way to criticize or complain (and don't tell me I didn't get complained to when I had to be picked up from school after a band trip at 3 AM, or they had to sit on the bleachers for a football game - nice to see you came, but listening to you complain negates that fact). I guess to a degree I'm jealous, because I know Dad'll never get excited about coming to see me, ever. Hell, I know I'll never talk to him again. Part of me is ok with that, because I don't really see a reason for him to. Part of me's not, though, because I really miss my dad.


Gonadz said...

Girl please, whoever is doing the rating on that thing is on crack... there were some real barkers in the 4's group... and you are WAY more attractive than them.. Kelly should at least be a 7 and you shouldn't be any lower than a 5. The Bert Show is gay anyways.

Gonadz said...

Hey I'll loan you my dad for hockey and baseball games. =)

Laura said...

COOL! Yay, yeah, your dad rocks. :^D Yeah... there were some cute people in the 3s, and some real dogs in the 7 and 8s. One woman looks like she's actually chewing her face. Amazing. I guess they gave her an 8 on technique. :^P

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